Why tummy why?
I had a 24 hour stomach bug on the 4th of July this year.
While many other Americans were out barbecuing, playing games and watching fireworks I was laying on my bathroom floor- sick, tired and crying. A headache that just wouldn't go away all day had turned into this.
Without going into all the gory and gritty details of a stomach bug it was a long exhausting night and my throat felt like it was on fire from the strain. While I was able to keep food down by the next day I was wiped out. It's been four days and I'm just starting to feel ok.
A lot of thoughts went through my head when it is 3am and I'm sitting in a bath tub in another desperate attempt to rid of this pounding headache. As my husband sat beside the tub with his head bobbing as he started nodding off again I was overwhelmed with emotion.
I'm sick and I HATE IT.
Being sick is never fun, but on top of all the other health problems and my back injury it's even worse for me.
I seem to catch things really easily too which just adds to my misery.
At least I have Justin. He helped me finally get to sleep by 5 am and took extra special care of me over the next few days. The stomach bug had caused my anxiety to skyrocket and I was very emotional. Lots of cuddling, cartoons and a cup of tea can really help!
I'm trying not to feel overwhelmed by my limitations. It's a daily struggle. When you are trying to warm up some leftovers for your dinner and you are shaking like a leaf after 5 minutes it is incredibly frustrating. And Justin is just a sweetheart of course, doing everything he can to make life fun and happy in between the pain and tears. I wish I could do more. I want to do more. But I can't and I have to be okay with that- and its REALLY hard to be okay with that.
I look at Justin cleaning away in our house and I sigh. I help here and there but it's far from what I want to do. I wish cleaning didn't require so much energy!
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I do have a fourth of July post that will go up soon, we were blessed to be able to see fireworks the week before so I didn't completely miss out.
Love, Rebecca
Praying for your health!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for all your health issues. Obviously, the stomach bug eventually goes away (although it can seem like it never will -- there is just nothing worse!), but the other conditions from which you suffer may be permanent. Have you been declared officially disabled? If not, have you thought of pursuing it? I would think there would be more therapies and benefits would be available to you if you were, anything from a disable parking pass to tax benefits and maybe even work opportunities. Also, have you ever considered that your home could have some kind of effect on your health? I have a friend whose entire family was sick off and on for over a year and it came down to some horrible bacteria living in the walls of their home (needless to say, they had to move). Just thoughts I have wondering why you ended up with so many health issues after you married (well, that's my assumption, so maybe that's not true).
ReplyDeleteWe have thought about getting me declared disabled by my Doctor but he wanted me to try a few different options first for my health. He has been really awesome so far.
DeleteSince we live in a semi basement apartment we have wondered if that could be a trigger for some things. Still looking into that.
I actually developed PCOS in my 17-18 year old years. I was not officially diagnosed until after I was married. I had a few tests done but that dr at the time couldn't figure out what was wrong. I just finally started getting diagnoses AFTER marriage so that's why it seems that they have only appeared after I moved.
My back problem is a whole other ball game of course. I do think losing weight might improve that problem but that is easier said then done.
Thank you for your kind message- it means a lot!